Mistyrayn Posted April 1, 2009 Report Share Posted April 1, 2009 Usually everyone who has a dog would call him Rover or something, well I call mine Sex. Sex is a very embarrassing name, but I never knew how embarrassing until one day I took Sex for a walk and he ran away from me. I spent hours looking for him. A police officer came along and asked me what I was doing in the alley at 4 oclock in the morning. I said, I was looking for Sex. My court case comes up next Thursday. One day I went to City Hall to get a license for Sex. The clerk asked me what I wanted, I told him I wanted a license for Sex. He said I would like to have one too! When I said But this is a dog, he said he didnt care what she looked like. Then I said, You dont understand. Ive had Sex since I was two years old. He replied, You must have been a strong boy. When I decided to get married, I told the minister that I wanted to have Sex at the wedding. He told me to wait until after the wedding. I said, But Sex has played a big part in my life and my whole lifestyle revolves around Sex. He said he did not want to hear about my personal life and would not marry us in a church. I told him everyone coming to the wedding would enjoy having Sex there. The next day we were married by the Justice of the Peace. My family is barred from the church. My wife and I took the dog along with us on the honeymoon. When I checked into the motel I told the clerk that I wanted a room for my wife and myself and a special room for Sex. The clerk said that every room in the Motel is for Sex. Then I said, You dont understand. Sex keeps me awake at night, and the clerk said,Me too. One day I told my friend that I had Sex on TV. He said, Show off! I told him it was a contest, and he told me I should have sold tickets. When my wife and I separated we went to court to fight for custody of the dog. I said, Your Honor, I had Sex before I was married and the Judge said, Me too. When I told him that after I was married Sex had left me, he said, Me too. Well now Ive been thrown in jail, been married, divorced and had more trouble with that dog than I ever gambled for. Why just the other day when I went for my first visit with the psychiatrist and she asked me, What seems to be the trouble? I replied, Well, Sex has died and left my life. Its like losing a best friend and its so lonely. The doctor said, Look Mister, you and I both know that sex isnt mans best friend. Why not get yourself a dog? What'd You Think? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sarah Posted April 1, 2009 Report Share Posted April 1, 2009 pmsl love it!! lol Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BingBlaze n Skyla Posted April 1, 2009 Report Share Posted April 1, 2009 lmao thats rly good lol Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nanook Posted April 1, 2009 Report Share Posted April 1, 2009 that is too funny. I am not big on cats, I don't dislike any animal but I prefer dogs and I love huskies,(after the first one I couldn't see having any other dog besides a Sibe. Anyhow, about 10 years ago I knew someone that was having a baby and was going to put the cat down because she was afraid of the cat around the baby. Now this cat was declawed and spayed. Me being the animal lover that I am couldn't see her put down so I took her off the womans hands. The first day I had her she roared like a lion and ripped a friends arms up so bloody that I decided to name her bitch. She tamed out but it was hard to keep her at first. It was most embarassing to take her to the vet and tell them her name was bitch or when company came over and I would call her by her name...but it was never a more fitting name for any animal lmao Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sarah Posted April 2, 2009 Report Share Posted April 2, 2009 lmao what a good name!! - good for you on rehoming her though! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Austinville Posted April 2, 2009 Report Share Posted April 2, 2009 Great one Richard! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
siberian_wolf Posted April 2, 2009 Report Share Posted April 2, 2009 lmao pmsl rofl very funny! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
little lew Posted April 2, 2009 Report Share Posted April 2, 2009 where did you get the joke from its so coooooooolllllll !!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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