Kaiya Posted October 29, 2009 Report Share Posted October 29, 2009 So Kiaya seems to be a bit jealous of Nahla at times and I am curious how to handle it. It happens more so with me than my wife, but Kaiya has always been a little bit of a daddys girl anyway. My wife is also around both dogs all day at work where as I just see them in the morning and evening. During the day at my wifes work they are in separate kennels but next to each other. When I get home from work, both kids are happy to see me, but if Nahla comes running up to me, Kaiya will tackle her. It doesn't look like dangerous aggression, but its apparent that Kaiya doesn't want Nahla getting to me either. After dinner, I also take Kaiya for a walk, been doing this since we brought her home. When it's time to get ready for the walk, again Kaiya won't let Nahla get near me. After we get back from the walk, Kaiya doesn't mind Nahla getting near me at all, although sometimes if I am petting Nahla, Kaiya will lay across the room staring at me. The evening walk is the only time Kaiya lunges at Nahla when we are going outside (Kaiya knows when it's time for her walk when I put her harness on). If there is no harness on Kaiya, there is no issue with me taking them both out. If the harness is on and I am the only one getting ready to go out, Kaiya gets mad. If my wife is also getting ready to go out, there is no problem. I should say if we all go out, Kaiya doesn't care which one of us holds her lead. How should I handle the jealousy? While it's nice that Kaiya has so much affection for me, I don't want to end up having a mom's dog and a dad's dog. Up to this point, really the only way I have handled it is ensuring I give Kaiya attention when I get home first, then as I pet her I coax Nahla over while keeping Kaiya on my other side and try to show her that I can give attention to both of them. After Kaiya's walk, she is much more forgiving about me giving attention to Nahla, but like I mentioned sometimes she does give me the "why don't you love me anymore" stare. Any tips? I'm sure I am forgetting some details, but I'll add them as I think of them. Sorry so long. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BingBlaze n Skyla Posted October 29, 2009 Report Share Posted October 29, 2009 wud it b possible 2 pet nahla 1st instead so kaiya knows that 'bein mean' and pushing nahla out ov the way so 2 speak does not gain her any attention? do u tell her off when she does the above? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Austinville Posted October 29, 2009 Report Share Posted October 29, 2009 IMHO, dogs are not 'jealous' of one another. I think Kaiya is showing some dominance over the Nahla. There are others here with much more experience with that than I, so I shall leave this for them.... In my experience, Siberians often prefer one human over another - for different reasons. In your case, I would guess that kaiya is making the rules and has chosen you as 'hers'. I could be way off here, but that's my opinion. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sarah Posted October 29, 2009 Report Share Posted October 29, 2009 I'm with Austinville on this - dogs aren't jealous of each other so to speak - we portray our human emotion of jealousy as basically, we don't think like they do. Try ignoring them until they are both settled down - don't give them attention when they ask for it - give it them when YOU ask for it Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lana Posted October 30, 2009 Report Share Posted October 30, 2009 Pack Leader: Correct me if i am wrong but you did you "her" for both dogs which means they are both females right? Not an expect on Siberian Huskies but i have read in several different resources that with two female huskies have a more potential to display dominance than two males, or male and female due to alpha issue. It is important to display that your are the alpha male or they will continue to claim rank/alpha. It is also important that you try your best to ensure both get the same rewards and praises. (not the words but actions). It is important that you spend the same amount of time with each dog. Be aware of "daddy's little girl" because actions speaks louder than words. In a way your already saying that one dog is closer than other, therefor displaying affection is different subliminal message. You being the pack leader/Alpha of the pack should correct them right on the spot. Re-enforcing that you are the only Alpha! Here is another technique i use: Since they both are jealous the one that says jealously action towards another dog (kiaya toward Nalha) address the non jealous do first and then right after the jealous dog. Now both method i suggest using. They will learn that in order to get attention i must not do this and that it is unacceptable to say aggression. Now once again let me be 100% my method of training is not the only way. I take it that some of us are not aware of recent studies. According to recent studies dogs does experience "jealously" but it is primitive and not complex like when humans experience Jealously. (professor Mark Bekoff, Dr Friederike Range,Dr Paul Morris just to name a few ) Primitive meaning it displays a type of mild aggression. I hope that i have been of some help. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bec Posted October 30, 2009 Report Share Posted October 30, 2009 I would be implementing NILIF strictly, right away. http://k9deb.com/nilif.htm Don't worry so much about being fair or equal. You give the dogs attention, praise, any resource they want like food or toys on YOUR terms and your terms only. There are times when I might spend more time with one dog than the others; walk one but not the others; take one out and leave the others at home etc. I can't always be worrying about being "fair", and because I am the alpha in my house my dogs know that it's on my terms or not at all. If your post is any indication, Kaiya sounds like she thinks she has control and that she is the one who can make the big decisions. Don't let her be the decision maker or learn that any of her negative behaviour means she will get her own way and "win". By pandering to her and paying her attention first you are letting her think that she's the most important member of the pack. When you get home try this instead - ignore the dogs completely. Greet every person in your house first; your wife, your kids/house mates etc. Get changed, have a drink etc and when you decide to greet the dogs do so on your terms only - tell them to sit and the first one with their bum on the ground gets the first pat. If they don't sit (and they know the command well) they miss out. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kaiya Posted October 30, 2009 Author Report Share Posted October 30, 2009 When you get home try this instead - ignore the dogs completely. Greet every person in your house first; your wife, your kids/house mates etc. Get changed, have a drink etc and when you decide to greet the dogs do so on your terms only - tell them to sit and the first one with their bum on the ground gets the first pat. If they don't sit (and they know the command well) they miss out. hhmmm. thats a good thought. i'll give that a try. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lana Posted October 30, 2009 Report Share Posted October 30, 2009 Pack Leader: As mentioned before show the dog that is not being jealous attention first. Being fair is important when you are dealing with this situation for the first time. I also stated is posts before about a pack leader should always address human members first, all members should bet her first out the door, and the first one in the house. I have also stated several other suggestion that pack leaders should practice for example: You dog should not be in the same area when you and your family is eating. In the wild the pack leader eats first and tolerate no other around until the leader is done. As all ideas are great and you will do what method you feel is best for you but just consider all suggestion then made a choice. Remember you are not stuck with just one choice if it fails. Good Luck Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bec Posted October 31, 2009 Report Share Posted October 31, 2009 Pack Leader: As mentioned before show the dog that is not being jealous attention first. Being fair is important when you are dealing with this situation for the first time. I also stated is posts before about a pack leader should always address human members first, all members should bet her first out the door, and the first one in the house. I have also stated several other suggestion that pack leaders should practice for example: You dog should not be in the same area when you and your family is eating. In the wild the pack leader eats first and tolerate no other around until the leader is done. As all ideas are great and you will do what method you feel is best for you but just consider all suggestion then made a choice. Remember you are not stuck with just one choice if it fails. Good Luck As the pack leader attention should be on your terms, not the dogs, and IMO trying to make everything fair and equal only starts pandering to them. It's just not possible to be fair or equal all the time, if you teach your dogs that any resource they value like food, treats, toys, praise, attention etc comes on your terms and your terms only then it doesn't matter if you are "fair" or not. I guarantee the dogs aren't keeping tally. This isn't about "jealously" IMO so much as it's about one dog stepping up and thinking they can control the situation. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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